I believe in you
by firediamond
Summary: When he had nothing...she gave him everything. DMHG.
1. Chapter 1

Okay! I just got this idea for a story! It may be the same as all the other suicide stories, but I wouldn't know. Because I don't read those. Well, this isn't really a suicide story but. . .yeah...whatever. It's DM/HG!!! Enjoy!...I hope! Read & Review!  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the HP characters! They all belong to the brilliant J.K. Rowling! :)  
  
It was a cool, clear day, and Hermione Granger was exiting the school, and making her way over to the Greenhouses, humming a happy song. After all she was feeling very happy indeed. The dream she had last night, left her feeling warm, and content.   
  
The main subject of this happy dream was Draco Malfoy. They had been sitting in a field of green grass, and beautiful wild flowers, laughing and talking. Nobody knew it. . . nobody would probably even be able to guess it, but Hermione had a little thing for Malfoy.   
  
His voice was so intoxicating, seeping into her body, freeing her soul; when he moved he was so graceful, yet so powerful; and his eyes were so piercing, she felt her knees crumple every time he looked at her.  
  
Hermione was suddenly yanked out of her pleasant daydreaming, a confused, sort of panicked, slightly raised voice, "What are you doing? What is that?. . . Draco, what the fuck are you doing?"   
  
Hermione whirled around to look at the point where the voice had come from. Standing around a platinum haired boy, with something pointed at his head, was a group of Pansy Parkinson, Marcus Flint, Gregory Goyle, and Vincent Crabbe. They were all cautiously surrounding him, trying to figure out what to do, "Draco what is that thing? Wh..what are you...?" Pansy wailed. "It's a gun bitch, a gun! A muggle weapon, and it's actually a good thing! Do you know what this does?" Draco asked. Pansy shook her head. Draco looked up at the sky, and pulled the trigger. Next second a dead bird made a thud on the ground right in front of Pansy. Draco grinned crazily, and Pansy broke into tears, as Draco put the gun back on his head.   
  
Hermione was confused. She seemed to be watching the scene, without really watching it. The world seemed to be in a deadlock as Draco stood there with a gun pointed at his head, encircled by his best friends, and a sobbing girl.   
  
Hermione was suddenly brought back to life as she felt many bodies rushing past her. The Slytherins were all running towards the oddly-frightening sight. Coming to her senses the girl chased after the crowd.  
  
By the time she got there the 'audience' was so huge that she couldn't even see Draco. Someone shifted uncomfortably, and Hermione could see Draco's face. It was scared, and tear streaked. "Everyone back off! Just go! Go away!" Draco shouted, taking the gun from his head and pointing it at the crowd. Everyone screamed and backed away. This gave Hermione the chance to do   
  
something she didn't even pause to think about. Instead of moving backwards like the rest of the crowd, she moved forward. Draco shifted his eyes to her. At once Hermione felt something jolt inside of her.   
  
The rage in his eyes startled her, but she calmed herself enough to say, "Draco, why are you doing   
  
this?" "Why the fuck do you care mudblood? It's not like you ever have, it's not like anyone ever has." He sneered. "Draco, please, think this through. Think of what your going to do! Think of who your going to hurt!" Hermione pleaded, though not in a panicked way...more panicking was the last thing that Draco needed right now. "Who I am going to hurt?" Draco laughed. "The only person I'm gonna cause pain to is myself, and do you really think I give a shit if I shoot myself? I want to die! I just want to be free..." He said with tears started to stream again. "No! Your family will hurt too, think about what this will do to them!" Hermione reasoned sympathetically. "Ha! Bullshit. My "family" won't give a fucking damn if I die. They'll probably be happy. Trust me bitch. . .no one will care." Draco said in a voice so calm, and evil, it positively freaked Hermione out. Draco raised the gun to his head, closed his eyes, and got ready to cock the gun. "No, wait Draco. I care about you." Hermione said quietly, but still loud enough to be heard. "I believe in you, Draco..." Hermione was surprised to feel warm tears running down he r cheeks as she spoke.  
  
Draco's eyes snapped open, and he stared at this girl in front of him with a weird feeling exploding in his body. Hermione stepped forward and went to put her hand on Draco's shoulder, but before she had touched him, Draco jumped backwards, cocked the gun, and fired three times at Hermione.  
  
Hermione's breath caught in her throat. The pain was slowly defeating her. She continued struggling to breath. She looked down, but all she saw was red. A terrible deep, liquid red. She was overwhelmed with surprise, tears, heartache...and....and...  
  
Draco watched in a state of shock as Hermione fell to the floor. Too many emotions were flaming inside Draco. He had just shot someone. He didn't want to live anymore. He tried lifting the gun to his head, but found no strength to do so. His eyes rolled to the back of his head. His world was swimming in circles around him. His body fell to the ground, gun still in hand.  
  
~Okay! This is only the first Chappie! I really hope you guys liked it! Thanks to Shelley for BETAing it for me! :) I'll be able to write more this weekend, so there will probably be another chapter by Monday! R&R 


	2. Chapter 2

Wow! Thanks to all my reviewers! I was so excited, I called my friend and was like OMG! I HAVE REVIEWS!! Yah. . .but anyway! I'm REALLY sorry I didn't get this chapter out as soon as I said I would. I've been totally swamped with homework. On with the story! This chapters not as dramatic...but...yea. Hehe.  
  
~Chapter two~   
  
Hermione felt consciousness come back into her body. She opened her eyes, but everything was dark and blurry. Her eyes hurt from tiredness. She was about to close them again when she sensed someone close to her. She turned her head to see a boy sitting beside her bed with his head in his hands, blonde locks falling everywhere. She wanted to sit up, or even say something to him, but she was too weak. She couldn't move. She closed her eyes to try to rest them a little, but fell asleep again.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
The next time Hermione opened her hazel eyes it was light outside. She sat up and saw the headmaster looking at her with a smile. "Good morning Ms. Granger. How are you feeling?" "Fine..." Said Hermione blinking her eyes trying to take in the bright sunlight. "I'm glad. Fortunately Mr. Malfoy missed your heart, and we were able to save you. Madame Pomfrey suggests that you remain in the hospital wing until this afternoon." said Dumbledore. "Okay... Professor, where is Draco?" asked Hermione "Oh, well, I'm not quite sure. After he woke up, he disappeared. I know he is still on the grounds. He's just been feeling a bit lost. I think he would've left, if he did not want to make sure you were okay first. He's probably wandering around the grounds. But Ms. Granger there are other matters I must discuss with you. The staff, and school governors have decided there would be no punishment for Mr. Malfoy, because of the circumstances. Instead we have given Mr. Malfoy counciling every evening. However if you wish anything to be done about the incident, we will reconsider. . ." The headmaster said slowly.  
  
"No!" Said Hermione. "No, Professor. I don't blame him in the slightest. I just wanted to ask, professor." Hermione hesitated "Could I be Draco's counselor?" Dumbledore thought this over for a second but then said " I do not think that is a good idea. With Draco in his current state, I think it better that a professional help him." "But, Professor, could I at least help him a few times a week? I mean... maybe he would be able to relate with a fellow student rather than a counselor?" Hermione said hopefully.   
  
She had no clue why she wanted to be Draco's counselor so badly. She didn't even know why she even liked Draco after what he did to her. But something of what Hermione said to him, still lingered in her mind. "I care about you. I believe in you." Hermione wanted to show him that was true. That she wasn't just making it up to keep him from shooting someone. She wanted to show him a reason to live.  
  
A smile appeared on Professor Dumbledore's old face. "I suppose that would be fine Ms. Granger. You will meet him Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays, in the charms classroom at 8:00. I don't want you to do any actuall counseling I just want you to be someone he can confide in" Hermione smiled as well and responded "Yes Professor."  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
After the headmaster left, and Hermione had finished the breakfast Madame Pomfhrey had brought her, Harry and Ron rushed into the room and enclosed Hermione in a tight hug. "Guys!" Hermione choked "I do need to breath you know!" The boys laughed and let go. "Herm! We were SO worried! We thought you had died! Professor Dumbledore wouldn't let us in to see you! The only person he let in was Malfoy... that fucking Bastard!!" Harry said darkly. "The next time I see him, I gonna finish what he wanted to do in the first place!" Said Ron angrily. "No! Don't you guys! Please! Don't be mad at him. It's not his fault." Said Hermione seriously.   
  
Both Harry, and Ron looked at her amazed. "Hermione...The guy put three fucking holes in your body! And your forgiving him!?" Said Harry in disgust. "Well," Said Hermione. "I don't think there's anything to forgive. He was distressed and I scared him that's all." This statement left Harry, and Ron with the 'deer in the headlights' look. "Harry, what do you reckon Malfoy did to her head while he was in here with her all night?" asked Ron in all seriousness. Hermione rolled her eyes. "Seriously guys. Don't give him any trouble. He's going through some really hard times now. I really want to help him." "Hermione! What the fuck! You hated Malfoy like hell! Then he shoots you, and all of a sudden you feel the urge to be his best friend? I reckon those bullets did damage to your head." said Ron heatedly. This angered Hermione. "First of all Ron, I didn't even get shot in the head...so you can shut up about me being stupid okay!? And I think I'll be friends with whoever I want, with or without your approval. Alright?" Hermione yelled. "Whatever..." Said Ron looking taken aback. He turned and walked out of the hospital wing muttering something about craziness and PMS. Harry gave Hermione a tragic look and followed him out. Hermione Sighed.  
  
Twenty minutes later, Madame Pomfrey came over to Hermione's bed, and told her she could go. "Oh" The nurse added, "The headmaster would like me to remind you to meet Mr. Malfoy in the charms classroom tonight." "What?!" Hermione exclaimed. "What day is it?" She asked. "Saturday, Ms. Granger. You've been asleep for the better part of three days."   
  
Hermione avoided Harry, and Ron most of the day by staying in the library to finish the work she had missed while being asleep. At 7:50 Hermione went down to the charms classroom. She had to admit she was really nervous. How would Draco react to seeing the person he shot alive and well? And wanting to help him. Would he be embarrassed that he needed help, especially from a student? Hermione got increasingly nervous as she reached the Charms Classroom.  
  
She let out a sigh of relief as she entered the classroom to find it empty. This gave her time to compose herself, and get ready for what might come. She lit a few candle, and sat down at one of the tables and thought. She had only a little time because a minute later the door opened, and the tall, blonde boy appeared. He stared at Hermione for about a minute, turned and left. Without a word. 


	3. Chapter 3

~Again, Thank you so much to all my reviewers! They made me so happy! I've been doing a lot of stuff to get inspiration for the story. I think I've got some good idea's now, so here it goes!~  
  
~Chapter 3~  
  
Draco walked about halfway down the corridor before leaning against the wall for support. He felt so confused inside. Like all his emotions were fighting to the death with each other. He felt tears running down his face, not for the first time that day. He was disgusted with himself for doing so, but he couldn't help it. All day the Gryffindors, and even some Hufflepuffs, and Ravenclaws had been glaring at him. Normally he wouldn't give a shit about what other people thought of him, but this was different. For the first time he felt like he deserved the glaring, and the rude comments. He had almost killed one of their friends. He had almost taken the life of an innocent girl. Now the whole world was against him. He knew he was a bad person. He didn't deserve anymore than to die.   
  
That day Draco had received an owl from his father,  
  
Draco,  
  
What is wrong with you? You stupid boy. Is the life your mother and I have given you not good enough? You are nothing but a spoiled brat. If you wanted to die so much, you should have done it. I don't need to waste my time over you. I would have forgiven you, for killing the mudblood, but you didn't even manage to do that right. Go ahead and kill yourself. I have no need for you anymore, and neither does the Dark Lord.   
  
Don't expect to ever hear from me again.  
  
Draco had almost been looking forward to seeing Madame Moyse, the counselor her had been given . But when he had walked in to see Hermione he couldn't take it. He didn't deserve to ever look at her again. He had to leave. So he did.  
  
He felt someone grab his hand, and he whirled around. He was face to face with Hermione. She had a worried smile on her face. Draco quickly looked away. "Draco. . ." She began slowly, "Come on, lets go back to the room. We can just talk. Okay? Please. I just want to talk to you."  
  
He let himself be steered back into the charms classroom. She sat down in a chair, he sat down across from her, but still couldn't look her in the eye. They sat there for awhile. Neither knew exactly how to start, or what to say.  
  
Finally Hermione said, "How was your day today Draco?" Draco fought back the tears as he said, "Okay" "Great. Want to tell me about it? What did you do?" Draco didn't answer.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Hermione had never felt so uncomfortable in her life. She had no idea what to say. So she said this, "Draco? Do you want me to leave? I can understand if you don't want me here, and the last thing I want is to make you uncomfortable." Again Draco didn't say anything. Hermione's heart fell, she got up, and made her way to the door. She had her hand on the knob when Draco said, "Why?" Hermione turned around, he was still in the chair, his back to her. "Why what?" "Why are you here?". Hermione didn't know what to say. I mean, what was she supposed to say? Because I care about you? No. That would freak him out. "Because...I just wanted to make sure you're okay." Great Hermione thought. That was stupid, he probably hates me even more now.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Draco held his breath and turned in his seat to look at her. She was standing there looking at him. He could tell that she wasn't lying. That was the first time anyone had ever said that to him. No one had ever said it. Never in his whole life, had he heard those words directed at him. He felt some of the fighting inside him stop. He looked at Hermione as he never had before. She was still looking at him. Now that he thought of it, she was beautiful, really. He felt as though he had a connection with her now. "Will you sit with me?" He asked. He hoped that she still would. She crossed the room, and sat down in front of him. He decided to start this time. "Hermione, I'm really sorry."   
  
~*~*~*~*~   
  
Hermione knew he must be talking about: shooting her. She was happy that he was starting to open up to her.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Hermione smiled a warm smile at him and said, "It's okay Draco, don't apologize." She didn't understand, "No it's not," He said "From the first time we met, I have been nothing but an idiot to you. Over, and over again, I have embarrassed you and your friends. I have insulted you endlessly. And... and... I'm so sorry." He felt tears falling down his face again. He didn't try to stop them. He wanted to say what was on his mind before he lost his courage. "And then, after all I have done to you, you still found it in your heart to believe in me, when all my hope was lost. And you ended up hurt. Hurt in a way far more deadly than name calling, and humiliation." Draco could hardly see through the tears now. Hermione's figure was blurred. He couldn't believe himself. He could not believe that he had been such a bastard his whole life. "And even after almost facing death because of me, you still come back to me, and offer to help me. Hermione, I don't deserve this. I don't deserve your kindness. I don't deserve..." Draco couldn't take the thoughts going through his head. Here, in front of him, was an angel. She shouldn't be there with him. He felt Hermione's hand hold his, and her other hand wiping the tears from his face. He looked up at her. She was smiling at him, tears also rolling down her cheeks. "Draco, I don't care about all that. Just talk to me. That's all I want. Please, just let me be here for you." Draco gripped her hand more firmly in reply.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Do you guys think this is too corny? I'm not trying to make it that way, but just let me know is it's coming off that way okay? I'm also trying to make the chapters longer, but It's hard. There's only so much I want to say in one chapter, and I don't want to lengthen it in fluff, you know? Okay, I'm just rambling! Thanks for reading, and let me know what you think.:) 


	4. Chapter 4

~Hey everyone! I'm so sorry I haven't updated in a while. Last weekend I doubt I was home for more than three hours! I was so busy, and I was once again piled in Homework during the week. But anyway . . . Here's the new chapter! I cried while writing this! Lol! It's because when I write I listen to music, and I was listening to "Hello" by Evansessence the whole time while I was writing. The music really gives the story a more dramatic edge. If you have the CD, or you download music, then you might want to try it! I hope you enjoy the chapter!  
  
~Chapter 4~  
  
Hermione got back to the common room that night with a dazed sort of smile on her face. She couldn't ever remember a time where she felt so perfectly peaceful. Harry, and Ron must have noticed this, because they abandoned their game of chess, and pulled Hermione over to the couches before she could get up to her dormitory.   
  
"What are you so happy about?" Ron asked, in a slightly accusing tone. "Excuse me, Ron! How could I be so inconsiderate, as to not tell you every single thing that happens in my life?!" Hermione said snapping out of her joyful trance. "Woah, calm down Hermione." Said Harry. "Sorry Harry, I just didn't realize it was such a crime to be happy once in a while." Said Hermione, crossing her arms over her chest. "Ron just wants to know what's up." Harry said soothingly. "Nothing, I just happen to be in a good mood. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm tired." Hermione got up, but was stopped by Harry's hand catching her arm, and pulling her back. "Look, Hermione, we just wanted to say sorry about the whole Hospital Wing thing." Harry said, slightly rushed. Hermione paused "Wait, you're both sorry? Or just you Harry? Because strangely enough, I don't hear Ron saying anything."   
  
Harry looked worryingly at Ron. He didn't want Ron to storm off again. He really wanted to work things out. He missed being with both of his two best friends all the time. Ron sighed and said, "I'm sorry" Harry hoped this would be good enough for Hermione. She might just dismiss it off, as being insincere, but fortunately Hermione smiled, and swooped down to give her friends hugs.  
  
Hermione sat down between her two friends and smiled. "So where have you been all day?" Asked Harry, trying to get a conversation going. "Um . . . " Hermione started, thinking "Hospital Wing, Library, and with Draco . . . " Ron's eyes snapped to Hermione's face but he didn't say anything. Harry noticing this tension didn't press Hermione to elaborate. Instead he changed the subject.  
  
An hour later Hermione closed the door to her dorm and looked around. Lavender, and Pavarti weren't there. Hermione crossed the room and sat on her bed, thinking. It was great being friends with Harry and Ron again. She didn't realize how much their absence had affected her. However the most significant thing that had happened that day, was her conversation with Draco.   
  
He didn't really tell her anything special. He didn't tell her about his family problems, or about his friends. It was more of a "so . . . what did you do last summer?" conversation. Shy, but warm. Hermione was still hugely pleased by this. He was starting to feel a little more comfortable around her. She just needed to give him time. Hermione changed into her pajamas and crawled into bed. She picked her book up off the bedside table, and began to read until she fell asleep.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Draco rolled over and over in his bed, fighting his dreams. Images of cold, white, snow, flecked with red. People screaming. Not in a panicked way. In a much more terrifying way. Somehow, Draco knew these screams. Hopeless, tear filled screams. Screams that carried a person from life to death. This scene faded with one more sob and piercing scream from the unknown. Now he walked in a corridor, blood smeared all over the stone walls. It was Dark. The only light came from the small candles which lined the walls. The fire light flickered into shadows. It was cold. So cold. He could see his breath ahead of him. Echos of screams could be heard again, but where they came from he did not know. All he knew was that he was the only one who was still alive in this corridor. The firelight flickered and died. When he saw light again, he was outside. Nowhere he recognized. He could however, tell he was watching himself walking in a graveyard. It was fogged, and wind was blowing the rain hard into his face. But still he walked among the tombs. He seemed to walk forever until he collapsed upon a grave, and didn't move again.  
  
Draco opened his eyes. It was morning. He sat up, pulled away the curtains that surrounded his bed, and saw Crabbe, and Goyle sitting on their beds, eating candy. Draco got up, changed into black slacks, a black button up shirt, put on his shined shoes, draped his cloak over himself, and walked out.  
  
Draco walked aimlessly around the Hogwarts grounds. It was a dark morning, and it started to sprinkle, but he kept walking, thinking.   
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Hermione woke up coughing. "Oh sorry, Hermione" came Lavenders voice from behind her curtains. Hermione pulled back the curtains to see Lavender doing Pavarti's nails. "It's okay" Hermione replied. She was starting to feel dizzy from the fumes so she walked over to the window. It was raining, but she opened it anyway and took a huge breath. The air was crisp, and clean feeling. Hermione smiled, watching. The beautiful rain drops looked like glittering crystals falling from the sky. She reached out her arm, and let the cold drops fall on her hand. She looked out over the forest, and saw the trees swaying with the rain, and wind. Hermione loved this weather. It was so cool and calming. Peaceful, and beautiful. All the problems of the outside world washed away. She looked down and saw a tiny figure on the grounds. She didn't have to guess to know who that person was. The bright blonde hair was enough to give it away.  
  
Without thinking Hermione ran out of the dorm, still in her pajamas, earning herself a confused look from Lavender, and Pavarti. Down the steps, out the portrait hole, through the castle, and out the huge oak front doors, Hermione ran. The water drenched her as she ran with no thought other than Draco in her head.   
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Draco heard the sound of feet crushing the damp grass, he turned his head to see a very wet Hermione running toward him. Her red silk pajamas were clinging to her body, and her soaked hair hung heavily on her shoulders. She came running at him with such speed that didn't suggest she was going to stop. He opened his arms to catch her, and Hermione went flying into him. With Hermione's body pressed against him, he felt something he had never felt before. Life. The felling that everything just might be okay. He loved the feeling, and didn't intend to let Hermione out of his arms for a long time.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Meanwhile Pavarti, and Lavender were watching the scene from the girls dormitory window, frowns on their faces. Unable to stand the sight any longer, Pavarti went down to the common room. Lavender followed her. Harry, and Ron were in front of the fire talking, but looked up at Pavarti, and Lavender who had just entered the common room wearing nothing but panties, and tank tops. The whole room went quiet. Ron and Harry gaped, but neither of the girls seemed to notice, or care. "Would you mind telling us why Hermione is outside in the rain snogging Malfoy?" There was a sudden rush to the windows. Those who could not see, ran up to their dorms to look out their windows.   
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Draco took in Hermione's scent as he held her. Hermione stood there wrapped in Draco's strong arms. The two of them were completely oblivious to the fact that they were being watched by the whole of the angry, and stunned Gryffindor tower. 


	5. Chapter 5

Here's the new chapter! Hope you like! R&R.  
  
~5~  
  
When they finally broke apart, Hermione's eyes were sparkling. "Are you okay?" she asked. "Yeah...yeah, I'm great" Draco replied with difficulty. "I just thought I'd go for a walk this morning." Hermione smiled. As she looked in Draco's eyes, she noticed that the cold hardness they used to feature was missing. It was now a sort of misty cloud that Hermione could not interpret. "Well, do you mind if I join you? It's really beautiful this morning." Hermione said. "Yeah, sure" Draco answered thinking that the morning was not the only thing that was beautiful.   
  
They walked together for sometime without speaking. Draco stole sideways glances at Hermione as the walked. He suddenly realized that she was barefoot, and only in pajamas. "Hermione?" "Hmm?" "Aren't you cold?" They stopped walking, as Hermione looked down at herself and giggled. "I suppose I do look stupid don't I?" "No, no, you look fine...it's just that you must be freezing." Hermione giggled again, the fact that she was walking with Draco Malfoy wearing soaked pajamas struck her as funny. Remembering that Draco was still waiting for an answer, she thought. Was she cold? Either she had amazing heating powers, or she had gone numb, because she wasn't cold at all. "Nope, I'm fine thanks Draco." She smiled at him and started walking again.   
  
Draco watched Hermione as she started walking. God, she was so beautiful. Her lovely *slightly weighed down* auburn curls, and the deep red silk of her pajamas both very strangely allured him to her. He walked up to her and wrapped her in his cloak, so that they were both walking together in one cloak.  
  
It felt so natural to Hermione that she didn't even notice until she felt Draco wrap one of his arms around her waist. She leaned her head on his shoulder in reply.   
  
For some reason this surprised Draco, but he kept walking. With Hermione so close to him, it only made the rain more beautiful. They stopped when they reached the lake. The watched the rain break the usually still surface of the water. Draco felt that one hundred pounds had been lifted of his heart. He turned Hermione around to face him, and stared into her eyes. Their lips met.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
*This is supposed to be taking place just after Pavarti and Lavender made their announcement. So it's before the kiss...Just FYI. I didn't know how to put it*  
  
Harry and Ron (along with all the other Gryffindor's stared at the two figures down on the grounds, until they walked out of sight from the tower window. "So?!" asked Lavender. "What's going on Harry?! Why are they kissing? They're not...not going out, are they?" "They'd better not be!" Ron answered for Harry, who was still staring blankly out the window. "It does not look like they're kissing" Ginny put in. Pavarti turned her gaze to Ginny, her eyes narrowing. "And how do you know that?" she asked crossly. Ginny knew she shouldn't be sticking up for Hermione, but she wanted to hear Hermione's explanation before she went accusing her of things. Hermione was always so nice to her, she deserved to be treated fairly as well. "How do you know they are?!" Ginny shot back just as cold.   
  
Ignoring the disbelieving feeling he got from his sister's words (how could she be sticking up for Hermione?) He dragged Harry out of the common room. He was going to find out for himself.  
  
When they went back to looking at the lake Draco held Hermione more tightly. The sound of the rain seemed to be getting harder. But fall didn't seem to be getting heavier. Hermione and Draco turned their heads to see two figures sprinting towards them. Hermione felt her stomach drop when she realized who it was.   
  
"Hermione...what....the...fuck.." Panted Ron "Do..you...think you're doing!?" 'This is getting ridiculous' thought Hermione. 'Why am I not allowed to do what I want?' "What does it look like?" Ron sputtered, grabbed Hermione's arm, and dragged her into the entrance hall, leaving Draco by the lake.   
  
Once inside Ron turned to Hermione, and seemed ready to let his anger fall full force on her, but Harry cut in. "Hermione, why don't you go upstairs and change for breakfast? We'll talk later?" Hermione couldn't believe this. Her whole time at Hogwarts she let Ron and Harry tell her what to do. She wouldn't let them anymore. Draco gave her something Ron and Harry couldn't. It was more than friendship. She turned on her heel and made for Gryfinndor Tower without a word.  
  
Draco stared at the lake, looking at his breath. Hey, his breath was doing it, why not? He pulled out a cigaret and lit it. He put a vanishing charm on the cigaret so that anyone peering out their window would just see Draco breathing, and raising his hand to his mouth to blow on it and make it warm. He was bound to get in trouble if he was seen smoking. Right now he just needed time to think.   
  
Hermione had come to him. Offered to walk with him. And in the past few days...almost die for him, then try to help him. This was very strange. She had never shown this much interest in him before, why now? Perhaps this was a scheme of hers and her other two Gryfindor prat friends? Well, if it was, they were all good actors. Maybe Hermione was just deadly attracted to the depressed suicidal type? Or maybe, (Draco felt a stab in his heart, though he wasn't sure why) maybe she just felt sorry for him. That was definitely not what he wanted. Pity was just about the most stupid emotion Draco could think of. The only time his father had ever taught him to feel pity was when you were torturing a mudblood. Of course the pity came after you killed them and you saw their unrecongnisable dismembered bodies on the ground before you. And then the only pity was for the fact that they had to be such a pointless form of life that you had to go kill them.   
  
Draco felt another stab. His father. Well, he guessed, he wasn't his father anymore, as he had been disowned the previous day. It was a weird thought. A weird feeling, not being a Malfoy anymore. He really didn't know who he was anymore. He had always based everything he did, and said on the fact that he was a Malfoy. That he had to uphold the family honor, and keep his father's reputation. Now he didn't have to do that anymore, and he didn't quite know how to act. He supposed he could still be the nasty evil git he always was...but then he couldn't talk to Hermione anymore...Draco was yanked out of his thoughts by a thunder bolt. He decided it was time to go back inside.  
  
When Hermione entered the common room, heads turned to glare at her. Ginny went to pull Hermione into her dorm, but was beaten to her by Pavarti and Lavender. Ginny followed them up the stair case.   
  
Hermione was surprised to find her self thrown onto her bed then faced with two angry looking girls. "Hermione, what the fuck were you doing with Malfoy!?" asked Lavender "And tell us the truth!" put in Pavarti. "I wasn't doing anything." Hermione replied defiantly. "You think you're the only one who can see out of the damn window?!" Asked Pavarti, her voice rising "We saw you with him! Don't try to make shit up!" "Nothing!" Hermione said "I just wanted to walk with him." "WANTED TO WALK WITH HIM??!!" Screamed Lavender. "Hermione! Do you know how many times that fucking bastard has called me a mudblood? Fuck! Do you know how many times he's called you a mudblood!"  
  
"Would you guys just leave her alone?" Ginny's voice came from the door. Pavarti and Lavender whipped around to see where the voice had come from. On seeing Ginny they turned back to give Hermione a murderous stare before marching out of the room.  
  
Hermione was about to thank Ginny before she turned and left as well. 'What is going on!?' Hermione thought 'It's a fucking conspiracy.'   
  
Hermione sat alone for a while deciding that she could either go down to breakfast, or sit up here, hide, and starve at the same time. Thinking that she liked the first option much better she changed out of her now very uncomfortable pajama's and went down to the great hall.   
  
As she walked through the double doors she was glad for the fact that the whole school wore black. She didn't feel so singled out. However, as she reached the Gryfinndor table the blending in feeling vanished as Hermione spotted every resentful gaze. Looking down the table, Hermione noticed that Harry and Ron were not there. She shrugged to herself, wondering if she really actually cared anymore, and sat down. She chanced a look at the Slytherin table across the hall and noticed that a blonde haired someone was missing. No sooner had Hermione registered this thought in her head than the doors to the hall burst open again, and a 5th year boy yelled "FIGHT! On the grounds!!! Two Gryfindor against a Slytherin!!" The scraping sound that followed this announcement tortured Hermione. Everyone had left their seats and was running as though in riot to the place stated by the boy.   
  
Hermione didn't want to know who the fight was between, but she felt she already knew.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
I realize my writting has reached an all time shitty low, but I'm so piled in homework you cannot believe! I'm so pressed for time that I hardly have time to think my story through. Anyway, I'm just going to reply to a couple reviews. Feel free to ask question in your reviews!  
  
cash~ You asked if this was more PG 13.   
  
Yeah I can see what you're saying, but having it be R leaves room for my potty mouth, and freedom if I decide to be naughty in later chapters. *coughcough*  
  
Okay that was answering one reply! Oh well. Okay just to all my readers: I was going to put this in the story later on, but I don't want people to get impatient with me.   
  
Please do not think that Draco is OOC. I mean, he is, but being suicidal, and being disowned is going to change everyone's personality, Draco or not. Get where I'm coming from? Also SORRY!!! For making him cry so much! He's just a little lost right now. And as being different when he's with Hermione; he kind of goes in a different mood when Hermione's there. Yah, I wasn't really good at showing that in my writing...but now you know! Anyway. Hope you enjoyed the chapter. R&R please! 


	6. Chapter 6

READ ME A/N: In case you can't tell, this is going on at the same time as chapter 5, after Hermione leaves Harry, and Ron to go change. As soon as Hermione comes into play again, it all collides back in one time.  
  
~Chapter Six~  
  
Ron looked at Harry with disbelief. "Why'd you let her go?" Ron asked. "Because," Harry began, "we've been really hard on Hermione ever since she got shot. It's Malfoy we ought to be pissed at!" Ron's face brightened. "Your right Harry. Let's go"   
  
The two boys made their way back out onto the grounds, fury mounting with every step. After they had passed through the oak front doors they saw the figure of Draco watching the lake. They made their way over to him.  
  
As they reached him, thunder rumbled, and Draco turned around. When he saw them he stopped, staring blankly at the two boys that stood in his way. For a moment, not a word was said, and just as Draco was about to say "What?" Ron's fist went colliding into Draco's face, and behind Ron's fist was the anger, hate, and jealousy that Draco had been causing him for six years now.  
  
  
  
If the boy that had witnessed this thought he heard the thunder rumble again, he was wrong. He was hearing the mounting storm inside Draco.   
  
Draco calmly put a hand up to his lip, which he found was bleeding, and responded by forcing his fist back at Ron twice as hard. The tortures that Draco had managed to keep captivated inside himself since he was a child, were ripping apart their barriers and lashing out at Ron.  
  
  
  
Now, as sure as the whole of Hogwarts was that Harry wasn't one to fight, (as he was always the one holding Ron back), he was not one to just stand there let his friend be punched. He ran forward and hit Malfoy in the chest. Blow after blow Harry released his avengence for Ron. But now, Ron was back with him, punching Draco as if it brought nourishment to his body that food could not.   
  
Draco fell to the ground, and lay there for a moment. He could vaguely hear the panting of the two boys in the distance. He had let himself be beat by his two rivals. No! He suddenly thought. He couldn't let it happen, and he got up with remarkable strength.   
  
He brought Harry down with a strong kick, knocking the consciousness out of him, and then turned to Ron. However, Ron was too quick, he swung at Malfoy ripping parts of his shirt off, and leaving blood where his finger nails had been.   
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Hermione pushed out of her chair as fast as she could. She wanted out onto the grounds but it seemed like the whole school was blocking the doors. She however found a way to push her way through the crowd. The teachers, not as small, were left behind shouting for the kids to get out of the way, but to no success.   
  
When she finally reached the scene, what she saw terrified her. Harry lying lifeless collapsed on the floor. Ron with a black eye, and bloody lip, and Draco with his shirt spotted red and ripped, also with a very bloody rip, beating the shit out of each other.  
  
Hermione felt herself start to hypervenalate, shaking trying to support her body that was weighed down with so much grief. The once beautiful crystal rain seemed to turn black. The rain was impairing her vision. And then she saw nothing but black.   
  
"STOP" came the shocked voice of Professor McGonagall. "STOP THIS INSTANT!" Draco knocked Ron down with one more punch (Much to the delight of all the Slytherins watching) and then fell over himself. His legs felt so weak. He was breathing hard, as he looked around, he was astonished. The whole school seemed to be watching, in the front of the crowd were all the Professors, and a girl crying on her knees. Hermione. He tried to get up to reach to her, but his arms were suddenly grasped by Albus Dumbledore's strong, long fingers. Professor Flitwick had Harry, still unconscious, levitated, and Professor Snape had Ron, who was too weak to get up on his own.  
  
They were being led silently up to the hospital wing. Draco thought for sure he would be expelled for this. His only comfort was that Harry and Ron had to be expelled as well. People would be so astonished that the boy who defeated you-know-who had been expelled, that no one would pay any attention to him. Which was exactly how he liked it. When he was ignored, he was happy.  
  
  
  
When they arrived they were all put in a bed. Draco waited for any possible remarks, or lectures coming his way, but none came. Professor Snape muttered something to Dumbledore, who nodded and they both left the ward together.  
  
Madame Pomfrey came bustling out, making a fuss over his state, as usual. He could tell, however, that she wasn't as kind as usual. Presumably, she didn't approve of taking care of kids that chose to fight. Nevertheless, she mended his cuts, and his swelling lip, and told him (rather bitterly) to lay down and be quiet.  
  
She went over to Harry and Ron's beds and revived them. She gave them a potion, healed their cuts, and hurried off somewhere. After nearly ten minutes of deadly stares at each other, Dumbledore entered again, and pulled out a chair to sit in the middle of the three beds.  
  
He cleared his throat and said "I will not ask you why you were fighting, because human nature is all to predicable. However, I will ask you to tell me what you were fighting about."   
  
Harry and Ron exchanged nervous glances, and Draco felt uncomfortable on his own. What were they going to tell him? They had seen Draco and Hermione making out on the grounds, charged downstairs, grabbed Hermione, sent her away, and started attacking each other? How 'bout...no. That was not likely to get them out of trouble no matter how true it was. Instead Ron said " Well, ever since this, evil, stupid, ill...sorry, Malfoy shot Hermione, she's been acting weird. She doesn't hang out with us anymore! She spends all her time with Malfoy. We think he's been doing something to her head." Draco snorted "Yeah, that's highly likely Weasly" Ron looked around at Malfoy "Well she seems to be spending a lot of time with you! I don't see why you wouldn't have the opportunity!" Ron said, voice rising.  
  
Dumbledore spoke quietly "Please tell me, Mr. Weasly, if you are refereeing to the counseling that Ms. Granger has been giving Draco?" "Well, yeah" said Ron. Dumbledore frowned slightly, "And why shouldn't Ms. Granger be helping Mr. Malfoy?" "Well," started Ron slowly "Because he's a Slytherin, and Hermione's a Gryfinndor!" Still frowning Dumbledore said "But you are all Hogwarts student's, and you should all support each other, especially when one needs it."   
  
Nobody quite knew what to say after that, so Dumbledore said " Harry and Ron, if you are feeling well enough, I ask that you please go down to Professor McGonagall's office. She will need to give you your punishment. Draco, if you could please go see Professor Snape, but first, I would like to speak to you." Draco saw Harry, and Ron's eyebrows raise at this, but they slowly left the infirmary. After they were gone Dumbledore spoke to Draco, "The end of your sixth year is almost at an end. We must decide where you are going to stay for the summer holidays. I trust that you do not want to go home?" Draco shook his head. He doubted whether he would be allowed to go home, whether he wanted to or not.  
  
"I could make special arrangements for you to stay at the castle over the holidays if you would like?" "Yes sir, please" said Draco. He was feeling a bit depressed at this. He probably wouldn't be able to do much at the castle. Some of this feeling must have shown, because Dumbledore went on to say "You may visit the village of Hogsmead as often as you like, and you may have friends come and visit you, but I'm sorry to say that I cannot permit you to leave the grounds anymore than that."   
  
When he entered Snape's office, Snape's expressionless face looked up at him. He made a motion for Draco to sit down. After taking a seat, Snape parted his lips. "Before I give you a detention, I want to ask you something." "Alright" Draco replied with confusion. "What are you doing over the holidays?" "Oh," Draco said "I'm staying here I suppose." "Oh" Said Snape, looking relieved for some reason. "Okay, well, you will serve a detention with me this Tuesday from 8 to 10. Alright? You may go."   
  
It was great having a head of house that favored you, thought Draco as he left the office. He smiled evilly as he imagined Potter and Weasly getting three weeks of detention.  
  
Now Draco didn't know what to do. It was still raining and most of the older students had gone to Hogsmead. He quickly decided against Hogsmead as he would get enough of it during the Holidays. He thought of Hermione, but didn't think he should go looking for her, so he strolled out once more onto the grounds. 


	7. Chapter 7

I Believe in You  
  
Chapter 7  
  
Hermione sat in her dormitory alone, crying. She didn't quite know why, but she knew it had something to do with her parents. Her parents used to fight when she was young. Everything was alright now, but that didn't change the emotional damage it had caused her. As a little kid she had loved, and spent all her time with her parents. When they fought, it killed her. It pained her so much to see the people she loved trying to hurt each other.  
  
It was no secret she loved Harry and Ron, but why did she get that stab of pain to think of an upset Draco? She couldn't necessarily relate to him, and she had never seen his point of view, or for matter of fact gotten along with him before now. But for some reason she cared about him. Once again her words "I believe in you" came back to her. Suddenly she understood.  
  
Those really had not been words of desperation. Those had been words from her heart. Seeing Draco in his vulnerability had showed Hermione something. No matter how smug he may act, Draco needed support, and love as much as anyone else. Closing her eyes, the sight of Draco's panicked face as he held the gun to his head, reappeared in her mind. She wanted to know what a guy with everything could feel that would make him pull a gun on himself. Hermione got up and looked at her tear streaked reflection. She performed a charm to get rid of her puffy eyes and red nose, and left the dormitory only to stumble and fall onto a slide going down into the common room. Her vision slightly shaky, Hermione heard Ginny say "Haven't you guys already learned that you can't go up to the girl's dormitories?" "Shut up, Ginny" said the bitter voice of Ron. Hermione felt two pairs of arms help her up, and carry her across the common room, up another set of steps, and into a dormitory.  
  
Sitting on Harry's bed, Hermione cleared her head. Ron and Harry were looking at her nervously. 'What?" asked Hermione, shakily. She did not want to get yelled at again. Especially not now. "We're sorry" said Ron "We know that it's your decision to help Malfoy. We'll try and leave you two alone from now on. You just have to understand how hard it is for us to watch you spend all your time with him...and not us. We care about you too, Hermione. We don't want to see anything happen to you. Ever. We just want to make sure that you know that you can trust Malfoy. If he goes crazy again...there's no knowing what he'll do next. We just want to make sure you know what you're getting yourself into. Are you sure you can handle him on your own?" Hermione let the seriousness of her friends' words sink in, before she smiled, leapt up and hugged them both. "I love you guys." She cried, and they laughed, and hugged her back.  
  
Pulling away, Hermione said "I appreciate what you guys are doing. But I do know what I'm doing. Believe me, I know what a selfish bastard Malfoy can be, but I still want to help him. It's just that...he's so, well, hectic inside right now...he just needs a lot of attention. I can't let him feel lonely, if I want to help him. If I leave him alone for too long...you know. He's, well, he's suicidal, isn't he? I hope you guys can just let me do my thing...I need you as much as Draco needs me right now. Please guys. Try not to...to get all worked up?" She tried to explain in a rush. She was aware of how stupid that sounded, but she wasn't about to take back what she said. She needed them to understand how serious she was about helping Draco...even though it sounded completely made up.  
  
Just making up with her friends again, she didn't know if it was best that she immediately go looking for Draco. Though, she felt a pain of guilt in her heart. She knew that Draco probably needed company right now, much more than Harry or Ron did, but she stayed with them anyway for the sake of their friendship.  
  
"So...." said Ron. His stomach rumbled. "Want to go down to the kitchens?" They all laughed at Ron's probable three stomachs. Harry agreed, but Hermione said she was too tired, and would wait for them there.  
  
So Harry and Ron left, with the promise of butterbeer, and cake. A couple minutes after they had gone, Hermione made her way back down into the common room to find it full of students. She was so grateful to see that most of the Gyriffindor house had forgiven her along with Harry and Ron...they weren't giving her evil glares, anyway. She spotted Ginny, sitting in an armchair by the fire reading a book, and went over to her. "Hi." Said Hermione a little timidly. "Hey" Said Ginny back. "Whatcha reading?" Asked Hermione. "Uh..." said Ginny blushing a bit. "Well...you're never going to believe this...but..." Ginny lifted the book from off her lap to show Hermione the cover. It read Travels with Trolls by, Gilderoy Lockhart. "I don't care how psychotic he is. He's still damn bloody hot!" Said Ginny. Hermione burst out laughing, and Ginny joined her a couple seconds later.  
  
The sound of Ginny's laughter along with hers, made Hermione almost cry out of happiness. This is what being with Ginny meant. It felt almost as thought they were back at the burrow, gossiping and laughing about each others silliness. After the laughter had ended, Ginny went back to reading, and Hermione got up to look out of the tower window.  
  
It was almost dark outside, but she could still see a little figure walking around. Knowing who it was, Hermione felt a deep tug of longing to go outside and be with him, but the sound of Harry's voice stopped her. "Butterbeer?" Pulling her eyes away from the window, she replied "Yes" Harry rather quickly thrust a bottle in her hand, and went back to balancing the towering pile of food he was carrying. Hermione looked at Ron, to find him also carrying a huge stack. "Uh..." said Hermione half way between confusion and humor. "We thought we'd throw a bit of a party." "Drinks all around!" Yelled Ron as Dean, Seamus, and Neville entered the common room holding even more food.  
  
Twenty minutes later, everyone was laughing and talking even more enthusiastically, with the addition of butterbeer, and cake inside their stomachs. Everyone except Hermione, who sat alone by the fire, thinking, amazingly blocking out the loud talking going on around her. You didn't have to guess who she was thinking about. She felt so trapped inside this circular room. She could not believe the longing she felt to be outside right now. It was like an invisible force had grabbed hold of her heart, and was trying to pull her out onto the grounds. She got up and looked out the window, but she couldn't see Draco anymore. Either because it was too dark, or he wasn't there. Feeling her eyes start to water, she realized how stressed out she was.  
  
She slipped away from the common room and retreated to the silence of her dormitory. She decided to do some drawing, which was always therapeutic. She got her sketch book out, along with some pencils and started to draw. She decided to draw the castle, with its glimmering lake, and fresh green grounds. After she finished drawing this beautiful sight, she penciled in two figures walking together around the lake, and smiled at the thought. It wasn't until then that she realized it was almost midnight. Gasping at the fact she was up so late on a school night, she put all her drawing supplies away, just as a very hyper Lavender and Parvati came into the dorm. Lavender paused laughing to notice Hermione and say, "Well?"  
  
Hermione furrowed her eyebrows. "Well, what?" Lavender giggled a bit. Not at Hermione's response, but out of sugar high. "Tell us what's up! We want to know why! Is it because he's MAD hot and you want his DAMN SEXY body?" At this Parvati and Lavender burst out in straight hysterics. "What have you guys been smoking?" Asked Hermione, bewildered. Instead of getting a reply, she got even more uncontrollable laughs.  
  
Hermione rolled her eyes and got into bed sighing. "Well, it's good to see your pj's have dried, from you wet and wild outside this morning." Parvati commented, managing somehow to control herself. "Uh...yah." said Hermione. She really was getting tired of this. "Oh come ON, Hermione!" said Parvati, "Lighten up!" "What are you talking about?" Hermione asked accidentally letting go of her anger, and raising her voice. "Well, it's obvious, really." At this, for no reason, Lavender burst out in a disgusting version of Obvious by Christina Aguilera. "Lavender, Shut up." said Hermione "What's obvious Parvati?" Parvati stopped laughing, and suddenly looked deadly serious. "You just want the attention, don't you Hermione?" For the second time that day, Hermione suspected a conspiracy. "What..the..fuck?" "You want to be bad for one time in your fucking life. You're getting tired of being a little dork aren't you?" Hermione laughed out of complete absurdity. 'This is so not happening' thought Hermione. "...SO!" continued Parvati, stumbling a bit "You go for the deadly gorgeous, rebellious, bad boy Slytherin!" Hermione stared in amazement for a second, then said sarcastically, "Wow...you're just mapping out my whole plan! Good job Parvati."  
  
And with that she pulled her drapes back, and remained silent, until she heard Lavender and Parvati crawl into bed, whispering and giggling. Hermione lay awake, thinking. Is that really what people thought? Or was it just Lavender and Parvati being high....or drunk...or both? Hermione let out a confused, sad, impatient sigh, and closed her eyes.  
  
Hermione tiredly woke up at 6:00 AM the next morning, to get ready for the day. She was grateful to see that Lavender and Parvati were still asleep. She put her robe on, grabbed her toiletry bag, and headed for the bathrooms.  
  
Hermione felt even luckier that the bathroom she entered was empty, as she really didn't want to talk to anyone about anything right now. She washed her face brushed her teeth, and then moved to her make-up.  
  
Lavender entered, as Hermione was charming her hair to lay calmly curly, and didn't say anything. Hermione watched Lavender nervously out of the corner of her eye. "Shit." Said Lavender, annoyed as she dropped her lavender eye shadow, and it broke, powder flying everywhere. "Here," Hermione said, expressionlessly, shoving her eye shadow compact at Lavender, and leaving.  
  
Once back in her dorm, Hermione got dressed in her uniform and went down to the common room exactly at 7. Harry climbed in the portrait hole, fully dressed and smiled at Hermione. "Morning" "Good Morning." said Hermione. Silence. "Where's Ron?" asked Hermione. On cue, Ron appeared, still in pajamas. "S'it time for breakfast?" he asked drowsily, "Yah..." said Harry looking at Ron strangely. Ron grumbled grumpily, and said "Lets go..." he made his way over to the portrait hole, but Harry caught his arm saying, "You might want to change into something else first, mate." Ron looked down at his 'ensemble' and muttered "fuck" under his breath.  
  
Five minutes later Harry, Ron, and Hermione were making their way down to the great hall for breakfast. When they arrived, Harry, and Hermione sat across from Ron at the Gryffindor table, who was still comically disheveled. Helping herself to toast, Hermione glanced at Draco across the hall, but he wasn't paying attention to anything it seemed. Monday mornings didn't seem to do good for anyone. "Thanks" someone said, as they walked by, placing the eye shadow compact in front of Hermione. Hermione turned to say 'your welcome' only to see Harry slap Lavender's ass. 'Oh god...I really did not need to see that,' Thought Hermione. She turned to Ron to see his face in his pancakes, almost snoring. Hermione slapped her forehead, and went back to her toast.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Draco looked blurrily at his orange juice, and thought 'Mondays...are...stupid' He looked over at Hermione, but she wasn't looking at him. However, she was about the only one. People were still slightly afraid of him. No one had missed the fact it was still less than a week since he had shot someone, and knocked two guys out. And, considering who these three people were, there was also now no doubt that he really was in league with the dark lord. Everyone kept throwing him unsure glances now and then, and he was getting really impatient. Grabbing some toast, and his bag, he left the hall.  
  
He soon regretted his decision. He usually enjoyed being alone, but now as he looked at the stone walls, he suddenly got a flash of the dream he had been having every night since he shot Hermione. He closed his eyes, to see the stone walls spattered with blood, and opened them quickly again. He hurried up the stone staircase to his first class, trying to take his mind off it.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
The day passed normally, and finally, it was time for lunch, but Hermione couldn't relax. She had to go and ask her professors for further explanation on what she had missed, and to hand in late assignments. They all asked her how she was feeling, and she had told every one of them that she was fine...this was, all, except for Snape of course, who just sneered and snatched the essay from her.  
  
By the time she had left the dungeons, she realized, that it was already time for her afternoon classes. For once in her life, Hermione did not want to go to class. The only thing she felt like doing was talking to Draco. She was so worried about him. That fight must have messed him up more, and she hadn't even tried to talk to him. 'Oh well,' she thought. 'Maybe later tonight. And if not then, I'll definitely see him tomorrow at 8 for counseling'  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Draco arrived in the great hall for lunch, a little late. He had searched the school a little bit for Hermione, but upon not finding her, he decided to make his last check in the great hall. He didn't see her, and felt his heart fall. He needed to talk to her. He didn't know what about, but he just needed to for some reason. He felt oddly strange, and out of place without her.  
  
He sat down at his table, and helped himself to some turkey sandwiches, and a bowl of soup. He sat there, eating his food, but not really paying attention to it. He had spaced out from his friends' conversation, and instead discussed his thoughts about Hermione with himself.  
  
He had always found walking around outside to be calming, but when Hermione was with him that one morning...everything was so...so beautiful. He had felt so secure, and so happy. Although there wasn't much to talk about, there seemed to be a connection that didn't require the use of words. And even more than just having a connection, she gave him a reason to stay at Hogwarts.  
  
'But then, she's a mudblood. And I have pure blood...even if I'm not a Malfoy anymore. But then if I'm not a Malfoy, then it doesn't matter. But...fuck This is so confusing.' Talk now, think later. I just can't take this anymore. Where the fuck is Hermione? Draco pushed out from his seat, and left the great hall, to see Hermione, across the entrance hall talking to Harry. Draco felt something drop in his stomach as he looked at Hermione. He wanted to go up to her. But what if she was mad at him? What if the fucking potty, and weasel, told her that he had started the fight?  
  
Just as he was about to cross the hall, Hermione hugged Harry, kissed him on the check, and departed full speed up the stone stair case.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Draco, didn't go to dinner. He decided he needed a walk, before going to see Madame Moyse. But, just as he reached the oak front doors, Madame Moyse can over to him. "Sorry Draco," she said. "I was wondering if we could do this session early. My daughter needs some help at home later." Draco wanted to walk, but he followed her up the stairs anyway.  
  
"So, Draco. How have you been feeling?" "Uh...okay, I guess....I'm still having that dream." "Hmm." responded Madame Moyse, jotting down some notes. "Tell me about the dream, one more time." Draco sighed, resigned to the fact that he had to tell her again. "All I see is snow with blood in it, then I hear people screaming. Then I'm walking in a corridor, with blood smeared all over the place. And then I'm walking in a graveyard, and I fall and die..." "Hmm" Replied Madame Moyse, once again, as she took more notes. "Interesting. Well, what I think it means is-"  
  
"Uh, Madame Moyse, I was hoping we could talk about something else." Startled, Madame Moyse looked up. "Sure Draco. What's on your mind?" "Well, there's this person..."  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Hermione searched the Slytherin table frantically at dinner time, but did not see Draco. Harry handed her a chicken pot pie. "Thanks Harry." She said absent mindedly. "You okay, Hermione?" Asked Ron. "...Yeah..."She said, still searching the Slytherin table. Harry leaned in closer to Hermione, "Is it about Draco?" Hermione looked at Harry and nodded. Harry and Ron exchanged glances  
  
She could tell that neither of them were over the moon about this, but still Harry asked, "Do you want to talk about it?" Hermione shook her head. "Not here." "Then where?" "I dunno...somewhere where people can't hear us." "Lets go, then" Said Ron. Grabbing another pie, and heading for the exit. Hermione smiled and followed.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
"What about this person?" "Well, this person had really been there for me lately. I mean, except for the past few days. I mean, she was there, and then I got into that fight, and I haven't spoken to her since." "So...this is a girl...and she talked to you... and then you got in a fight...and now she doesn't talk to you...anymore." said Madame Moyse, as she wrote it down. She looked at Draco. "Do you know why?" "...No." Draco said "Well. It could be that I got in a fight with her two best friends." "Ah." Said Madame Moyse. "I see. Well since you haven't talked to her, I suggest that you do. Now I've got to run. Send me an owl if you need anything, Draco. I'll look over my notes and see you Wednesday." And with that she picked up her clip board, and purse and left the classroom.  
  
Draco sighed, not feeling any better, and went back to the great hall, thankful that it was still dinner. However he was hugely disappointed that Hermione wasn't there...again! 'Doesn't that girl ever eat?' He thought. But then he noticed that Potter and Weasley, weren't there either, and with a stab of jealousy knew who she was with.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
"So what's up?" asked Harry. They were alone in the Gyriffindor common room. Hermione didn't know why, but she just burst out crying. Harry, and Ron, quite alarmed, ran over to comfort her, Ron with a fork in his mouth. "Hermione!" said Ron desperately (not so amazingly, he had mastered talking with food in his mouth.) "Tell us what wrong!"  
  
Hermione found that she didn't quite know what to say. "Has Draco done something to you?" asked Harry. "No" Sobbed Hermione. "It's just that this last week has been so hectic and scary. I saw someone I've known for almost six years try and kill himself, then thought I was going to die, then gotten into a fight with you two, and then you guys got into a fight, and then he's not talking to me anymore and. And..." she knew she probably didn't make any sense, but she couldn't explain now, she could hardly breath. "Shh, Hermione...It's okay." Harry said, as Ron patted her back.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Draco sat alone, his head in his hands, resisting the urge to cry. Cry until he didn't have the energy to think anymore. His mother and father...were not his anymore. He didn't want to be a death eater, but felt that he had no way out of it. However, he wasn't sure he had to be anymore. That pretty much summed up how Draco felt. He wasn't sure of anything, and it was driving him mad. Had his father really disowned him? Or would he be back with more torture for Draco to live up to once he had calmed down? Either way, he was sure his father wouldn't want him to be with Hermione. Draco was used to being able to sit and sort out his problems. But now that he wasn't able to answer any of his questions, or organize his thoughts, he became frustrated. He roared, feeling his self control leaving him, he stood up, and threw his chair against the wall.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Another day passed with no sign of Draco. Hermione was greatly looking forward to her counseling appointment with Draco that evening. She wanted to tell him everything was okay. She wanted to talk to him about the fight. She wanted just to talk to him, actually. To see his face, and hear his voice. That was all she needed.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Draco was making his way to the charms class to meet Hermione. He was just at the Marble stair case when Snape exited the dungeons and called "Malfoy, where are you going? You have a detention with me, now." "Oh! Professor, could we do it later? I have to go see..." "Of course we can't do it later." replied Snape "Later, I have an appointment with the Headmaster about you." "What?..." said Draco confused. "Draco..." Said Snape with an impatient sigh "My office now. I want you to re-label some of my potion ingredients."  
  
Draco felt his heart flinch, and promised himself he would hunt Hermione down if he had to, if that's what it meant to apologize. He had completely forgotten that he had a detention that night. He hoped Hermione would understand...  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Hermione waited patiently in the Charms class, not wanting to believe that Draco wasn't coming. 'He couldn't be that mad...could he?'  
  
she heard the clock click 9:00, just as the tears started to fall down Hermione's face. She grabbed her bag, and ran for her dorm.  
  
A/N: I know it's been...oh, how many months since I last updated!? My computer died! I had to get a new one, and find out a way to transfer my files! Well, it's all done now, so here's a new chapter! Hope you guys didn't get too lost. Please R&R so I can improve as an author! 


	8. Chapter 8

**I Believe in You  
  
Chapter 8  
**  
**A/N PLEASE READ: (I know it's long...but please)** Alright. I realize I haven't been updating every week like I used to do...a long time ago. The truth is, I had decided to stop writing this story. I rarely ever find a D/Hr story that I really like. That was my most of my motivation for even starting this story: to write a story that I would actually want to read. I really do pay attention to my chapters. I really try to make sure everything is accurate, and I check for errors through and through. But it wasn't until I read chapter 7 about three times that I realized my story is going nowhere! I don't plan out my stories, I find my writing is more free if I don't. But then I get so caught up in my own drama, lol that it's really hard to write. It seems to me that chapter after chapter is just more crying from both Hermione, and Draco, and the Gryffindors throwing fit after fit. (FYI, I'm writing this about a month after I finished this chapter) So I just saw that I wasn't doing my plot justice. And my plot means a lot to me as it is based on someone I know. So I decided to stop. It wasn't until I looked into my old email account that I saw a review from 'hi' telling me to "update update update update goddammit" that I decided to give it another try. I know how disappointing it is to really like a story and just have the author give up on it. So here's another chapter. The point of this paragraph is: Please be patient with me and try to understand my struggle. I love everyone's reviews, they're a real motivation. So thanks guys. I know it doesn't sound like I have much faith in my writing, but...If you want the story to go a certain way please tell me, I'm totally open to suggestions. Thanks for taking the time out of your fic reading to read this. On with the story   
  
Hermione tried to stop crying as she stumbled into the common room. She was so hysterical, that she forgot that at 9 o'clock people were still doing their homework. She became unpleasantly aware of the fact that everyone was staring at her. She raced up to her dorm, and locked the door behind her. She didn't want to talk right now. Not to anyone. She fell on her bed and cried into her pillow thinking of her sorrows. 'Gryffindor and Slytherin don't work. Maybe I should just forget it.' She thought. But then Draco crept back into her head, and she knew she couldn't forget. But could he? Did he already? She continued to cry until she fell asleep.  
  
She was running around the grounds in the warm sun. She had a purpose...she knew she had to find someone. She didn't know who, but she felt an urgency in her heart that made her run faster. She ran until she reached the lake. Pausing for a breath, Hermione heard someone come up beside her. She turned to see Draco. The pull in her heart subsided as they glanced at each other. She knew now he was who she had been trying to find. But before she could speak, he raised his hand. It was holding a gun. Hermione was suddenly confused. This wasn't supposed to happen. Something was wrong. Suddenly she was surrounded by people, asking her why she wanted to kill herself. Hermione felt dizzy as she heard Draco shoot the gun. The bright sun turned black as the bullet pierced her flesh. She knew this time it had delved into her heart, and she fell backwards into the dark lake.  
  
Hermione sat up in bed, screaming. The pain in her heart...she was going to die. A few seconds later she felt two figures at her side. They were saying something. Hermione stopped screaming, but she was still breathing hard and panicking. She grabbed her chest, trying to make the pain stop. Frantically trying to find the hole, but not knowing what to do when she found one. The strange thing was, was that she never did find one. "Hermione! Hermione! Are you okay? Shh just calm down." Lavender was hugging her. "What wrong Hermione?" Asked Parvati. She sounded very scared. "My heart, there's a bullet. I can't breath." Hermione gasped. "Parvati, go get Madame Pomfrey." Parvati ran hurriedly toward the exit and disappeared. Lavender continued to hug Hermione, and tell her to relax, slowly the pain subsided but still the only thought in Hermione's head was that she was going to die. Ten minutes passed, and Madame Pompfy strode over to Hermione immediately and started to do a check up. After Madame Pomfrey had satisfied her curiosity that Hermione was perfectly fine except for a fast beating heart, she asked Hermione what happened. "Someone shot me!" Hermione panted, leaving Draco out of it for some reason.  
  
"Now?" asked Madame Pomfrey. "Yes!" Said Hermione still very scared. Why could no one see her bleeding? The nurse turned to Lavender and Parvati, as she gave Hermione a calming potion and said. "It's just a bit of post-trauma. She'll be alright. Just sooth her. Help her fall asleep again. Don't hesitate to come get me is something happens."  
  
Hermione sat still in her bed, for a long time after Madame Pomfrey had left. Looking at the clock it read 12:00 am. Now that she recognized it was a dream, she felt sort of foolish. But the pain had been so real.  
  
Lavender and Parvati shuffled nervously. "...You should get some sleep." Said Lavender after a while. Hermione was still too concerned with her heart to be too concentrated with what they were saying, but she still smiled at them wearily. They crawled back into bed. "Do you want us to talk you to sleep?" Asked Lavender. "No thanks guys. I need a walk. Don't wait for me. Just go to bed. I'll be fine. I need to clear my head." Lavender and Parvati looked worried but let her go.  
  
Hermione wandered the grounds by the moon light. She felt scared. She had forgotten it was late. And she suddenly realized she had gotten out to the grounds without being caught. It was way past curfew. She heard foot steps behind her and absolute fear rose in her. She stopped breathing, and started to cry a little bit. She couldn't move. She had never been more afraid in her life.  
  
He had used his invisibility cloak. He couldn't sleep so he got it out, and went out to the grounds. The coolness of the air made him shiver. He started to walk in the bright moon light. He saw a figure in shadow a little way a long. The persons back was turned to him, so he approached cautiously. When he was a ten feet away he saw the bushy hair, and knew with a flutter of his heart who it was. He kept walking until he was right behind her then said "Hermione?"  
  
Hermione knew that voice. She spun around to see...nothing? Confused Hermione said timidly "Draco?" And he suddenly appeared, pulling off a cloak. "Hi" He said awkwardly. Forgetting everything Hermione grasped out for him in a hug and wouldn't let go. He wrapped his arms around her, and held tight also. Still hugging her he said. "I'm so sorry I wasn't there. I had detention, for the fight."  
  
Hermione smiled into his chest. Happy that that was the reason he had not showed up. She was so relived  
  
Feeling the smile, he continued, guessing she wasn't mad. "It's been hell without you." She looked up at him and whispered "I know what you mean," Before pulling him closer so she could kiss him.  
  
If, at that moment you asked Hermione when the first Goblin Rebellion occurred, she would not be able to answer you.  
  
Hermione was woken the next morning at six thirty by Lavender and Parvati. 'Sorry to wake you...but if you don't get up soon, all the cinnamon rolls will be gone!" Said Parvati with a smile. 'Mmm Cinnamon rolls...' thought Hermione.  
  
"How are you feeling?" asked Harry at breakfast. They had of course heard the news of the previous night's events from Parvati and Lavender. "Fine!" said Hermione smiling. How could she give a shit about anything else when she had had a lovely midnight stroll around the grounds with Draco? Harry was slightly unnerved by her enthusiasm, but returned to his cinnamon rolls anyway.  
  
The school year finished as expected. No one's fear of Draco Malfoy really subsided, but Hermione and Draco grew closer than either thought was possible. They spent just about all their spare time together studying in the library. Which I might tell you was a lot of time. Draco wasn't one to study like that but anything that involved Hermione was okay by him. At least he aced all of his finals that way.  
  
But now as he was seeing Hermione down to Hogsmeade station, he couldn't help but feel a bit sad that she was going home to her family, and leaving him behind.  
  
Outside the train Harry and Ron nodded a goodbye, and went to find a compartment while Hermione stayed to bid a bit longer of a goodbye. Harry and Ron had by no means become friends with Draco, but they had figured that he wasn't going away anytime soon so they at least were respectful for Hermione's cause if not anything else.  
  
Hermione pulled Draco away from the chattering students to find a bit more of a private place. She turned to look at him and smiled. Still holding his hand she went up on her tip toes and kissed him. He immediately kissed back, and smiled at the warmth that spread through him at her touch. He pulled her into a hug and they stood there silent for some time just enjoying the closeness. "I'm going to miss you so much" Draco spoke, feeling it was one of the most truthful things he had ever said in his life. "I know," said Hermione, and she went up to kiss him again. Draco stroked her hair, and took in as much of her scent as he possibly could. She was actually crying as she pulled away. "Aww come on Hermione, it won't be that long, and we'll write...your parents don't mind owls do they?" "No" Hermione said tearfully trying to see the best in things.  
  
The train conductor called for all boarding passengers to get on the train, so Draco gave Hermione one more fleeting kiss before helping her onto the train.  
  
Draco sat in the special room he had been given for the holidays looking out the window. "Draco?" Draco turned around suddenly to see Albus Dumbledore. 'I was hoping I could speak to you." "Yeah," said Draco turning more completely to show more courtesy to his headmaster. "Um. Sir" Draco began, "I just wanted to thank you for allowing me to stay here."  
  
Professor Dumbledore waved his hand to show it was nothing and began his speech. "Draco there are many things I need to figure out before you get too settled in. First of all, I have checked the Ministry records often over the past few months and there have been no official papers of your fathers disowning. This does not mean however that you must go home if you do not wish to. Your father may have legal right to you, but it still is my job as headmaster to make sure that all of my students are healthy and happy. However, this does create problems. I take it he will not take this lightly. In fact he will most likely take it quite insulting. If he does try to contact you, it may not be pleasant. So now, Draco we must decide your future. If you want nothing more to do with your father, we must take certain measures to ensure that you are not harassed. But if you do wish to remain a son of Mr. Malfoy, it is best that we all sit down together and work things out. This is a big decision for you I know, so I will let you spend a few nights on this one. But please come up to my office before the end of the week. Even if you are still undecided." He paused to give Draco a searching stare.  
  
"Now on to tings I'm sure you are more willing to discuss. Your wandering rights for the rest of the summer holidays. As I said you are allowed to visit Hogsmeade however often you like, but I must warn you to take caution whenever you do, and be back to the castle before dark. You may also have students come to visit you over the summer, if you would like."  
  
Draco definitely knew he would like that. He made a mental note to invite Hermione back as soon as possible.  
  
Draco spent most of the rest of the day staring out the window, and occasionally wandering around the castle. He had stopped counseling finally, so he could do what he wanted during the evenings. He also spent a lot of time, writing letters to Hermione, most of which he crumpled up in frustration. Writing words would not be as easy as he thought. Nor would it get rid of his wanting to be with her at all time. He finally decided on more of a basic letter rather than a heartfelt composition.  
  
Dear Hermione,  
  
It's really weird being at the castle all alone. It's so quite. I miss you loads. Well, Dumbledore said you can come and visit me...so, do you feel like getting back on the train? Ha-ha. Let me know how you're doing and if you can come back and see me.  
  
Draco  
  
Before he had time to reject that letter he called his owl, and sent it away, feeling jealous that the owl would get to Hermione before he did.  
  
Hermione woke up the first day of the holidays with two owls waiting for her. She took the first one who was undoubtedly from Ron. He was inviting her to the burrow along with Harry for the summer. The next was from Draco asking her to come back to Hogwarts. 'Shit' Thought Hermione. She had two invitations and her parents wanted her to spend some time with them this summer too. Crap. She would have to talk this one over with her parents.  
  
Damn it Malfoy. You promised me an heir, and I do not want to wait another eighteen years for one. You will get Draco back, or pay for him with your life. Is that clear?  
  
"Yes, my lord"


End file.
